A Rose Garden......

She was a confident, twenty-four year old. She had very caring parents who instilled good values in her, not just by word, but by example. As far back as she could remember, she had always had health problems, even as a kid of eight. She, however, happily went about her life giving little thought to the ailments that cropped up lest they affect her joie de vivre. In her early twenties she moved to another city, went on to learn a new profession and excelled at it. She sought success and found it too, but in the bargain, she further damaged her health.

                                                

Years went by and at the age of thirty-two she moved back to her city, this time with even more health issues. She tried to ignore them as usual, but a year later, she could ignore them no more.

Even as a kid, she had always been over-weight, but having neglected her health she was now clinically obese. Suffering from a thyroid disorder worsened the scenario. She began taking thyroid medication but within eight months of the medication, something went drastically wrong. The medication was having an adverse effect. Her thyroid and her weight were spiraling out of control. She reached a staggering two hundred and eighteen kilos. Resultantly, she suffered from several obesity-related ailments. The soles of her feet began retaining water and every time she walked, it felt like she was perpetually treading on live coals. Her lower limbs cramped because of lack of blood supply. She suffered from high blood pressure and acute sleep apnea, wherein she would choke in her sleep and wake up gasping for breath.

She kept ignoring the ailments and the symptoms. Two months later, when the pain became unbearable, she could ignore them no more! A doctor, a surgeon no less, was called for a home visit because she was in no condition to even walk down two flights of stairs.

It was the surgeon’s first home visit. He was a surgeon, not a mere physician, hence wasn’t ever required to visit patients at their home. He examined her and honestly told her that she would have less than ten days to live if she did not immediately undergo surgery.

The lady underwent a series of life-threatening, surgeries over the years. These were major surgeries, not ones that could be done laparoscopically.

All through her surgeries she kept up a brave demeanor, more so for her parents than for herself, because she happened to be their only child. Though her parents, too, stayed brave and very jovial, each time she wheeled into the operation theatre, she saw a smile on their lips but dreaded fear in their eyes.

She was a firm believer of karma, but in the beginning when those series of surgeries began, she would wonder why she was fated to be cut up so much and so bad. The surgeries left her with unimaginable scars, some twelve or fourteen inches long, and some, even longer. Each time her surgery scars would take five or six months to heal. She maintained there was a reason for her suffering; she believed there just had to be one. She wanted an answer as to what that was. She craved an answer!

She clung to her faith all through her pain and agony. She believed that in spite of all she endured, there was someone up there giving her the strength to carry on each day.

They say when you are at your lowest you grasp on to whatever you can, to survive. One day fate brought her to a book. The book, ‘Many Lives, Many Masters by Dr Brian Weiss’, went on to be her log of wood to survive the rapids she was drowning in.

Her earlier views and thoughts on karma cleared up. She had always accepted the blows life dealt, but now, she accepted them gracefully, as lessons. She knew that these were lessons she had to learn to clear her karmic debt. She no longer questioned the blows life dealt, she simply accepted them with a whole lot of love. She no longer felt the need to question the Universe. In fact, every time life knocked her down, she learned to smile and sent into the Universe, a ‘thank you’ for the lesson life taught her.

The lady went on to live a healthy life. She still lives! Yes, she does. She never fails to send out a prayer of thanks, each and every day, for all the lessons life teaches her and for the strength life gives her when she needs it, be it through family, friends, strangers or even a book.

She understands she has to nurture the soil (soul) given. She has to plant the right seeds and water them with care and devotion. The weeds need to be trimmed when they appear. She understands she has to give the plants time to grow into a beautiful garden. She understands He never gives us a ‘ready-grown’ rose garden. He teaches us to grow one of our very own. She is learning to grow one too.

~ Bawi ~

Painting: Roses - oil on canvas by Khorshed Bokdawalla

Photography: Kainaaz Writer Bokdawalla